I heard a podcast yesterday with motivational speaker guru, Tim Sanders. I believe him to be a person of faith, perhaps because he often speaks at Christian leadership conferences. He has a new book out called “The Likeability Factor.” I think the book sounds interesting enough, and agreed with most of what he said in the interview. Here’s a basic summation of his book.

“Life is a popularity contest,” Sanders says. “We want to work with people that make us feel good to be around them. Likability is the tiebreaker to almost anything.”

Likability is hard to define, but Sanders says people gravitate toward others who deliver psychological benefits. In other words, likability is the ability to produce a positive emotional experience in someone else, such as making co-workers feel good about themselves.

Basically if all things are equal with those around you, (meaning giftings, talents, personal traits, etc..), the ability to be Likeable will push you over the top in your relationships. Think about it like this, Do you know a pastor who always preaches good sound things, and he encourages you when you read his books and listen to his sermons; BUT he seems like a such a out-of-touch ungenuine person. Do you ever secretly wonder, ‘How does he treat his wife?’ or ‘Wonder what he struggles with?’ I do. For me, I care more about how you are when you step off the stage, or come home from the job, than you are when you’re putting on your acting impersonation for everyone to see. The ability to be likeable, or GENUINE, is a much greater talent to hold on to than almost anything. Aren’t we drawn to the most genuine, real, likeable people anyways? I am.

But this brings up an interesting thought. Is it possible for people to be inherently unlikeable? Perhaps I know a few……