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Caring for Your Introvert

I’d like to help you take care of the introverts in your life. We love you and want you in our lives and we need you to help us at times. Consider it a respect issue. We don’t need you to cater to us, but if you are an extrovert and you live with an introvert, or work with an introvert, or your friend is an introvert; then you could learn a little something from these resources:

Caring for Your Introvert: The habits and needs of a little-understood group

Do you know someone who needs hours alone every day? Who loves quiet conversations about feelings or ideas, and can give a dynamite presentation to a big audience, but seems awkward in groups and maladroit at small talk? Who has to be dragged to parties and then needs the rest of the day to recuperate? Who growls or scowls or grunts or winces when accosted with pleasantries by people who are just trying to be nice?

If so, do you tell this person he is “too serious,” or ask if he is okay? Regard him as aloof, arrogant, rude? Redouble your efforts to draw him out?

The Inside Scoop on your Introvert Friends

Losing friends can be particularly difficult for introverts because we don’t surround ourselves with people. We prefer a few intimate friends to lots of less-intense friendships, and deep discussion with one person to a party full of festive chitchat. For us, losing one good friend can leave a larger hole in our lives than it might for an  extrovert  with 25 best friends.

Understand Your Introvert

So let s take a look at some insight that will help you understand and relate to your introverted lover, friend, child or employee.

  • Enough with the guilt
  • Space and understanding
  • Build trust
  • 2 to Tango
  • True communication

And finally, I love this short list of ways to care for your Introvert:




Jonathan Cliff is married to his wife Starr and they together live out their days with two sons and a daughter. Jonathan serves as one of the Pastors at Grace Community Church in Clarksville, Tennessee; where he works with leaders throughout the city to help develop Christian community that leads to deep and meaningful spiritual friendships. His journey has been an adventurous one, having served in the local church for 15 years in family ministry developing leaders, building environments for kids and students to belong, and encouraging parents to take big spiritual steps with their families.


  1. KLJ · June 24, 2013

    Every introvert who has read this loved it, perhaps saved the link, maybe even forwarded it to someone. And none of us commented because … um … we are introverts and do not have any impulse to create an online social persona or make a public comment to random cyberspace or …

    But you deserve to know that we agree and we appreciate you being so PUBLIC on our behalf.

    (Going back in my cave now — I’m exhausted!)


    • Jonathan Cliff · June 25, 2013

      Thank you for coming out of the cave and talking. I was wondering where all the Introverts where, but then I assumed they were locked away in some coffee shop somewhere…