Recently, I’ve entered into a new position, in a new church, in a new town, while living in a new house, but still with my old family. (Which isn’t all that old…) There have been boxes to unload, and so many new people to meet. Over the next 2 weeks I thought I would speak about some of those transitional moments for me. Not that I’m more special than anyone else, but I’ve done quite a bit of self-reflection over the past 2 months to find myself where I am now. Let’s consider this documentation of that self-reflection.
I’ve found that the best advice moving into something unfamiliar is to not try to hard to make what I want to happen…happen. I’m not talking about programming, church-work, staffing changes, etc… I’m speaking towards the things I really want. Friends, confidants, mentors, and those people who generally make living somewhere worth living there.
I find myself living completely inside the tension of wanting to make new friends, but also trying to take the time to find who’s friendly. It’s the tension between wanting to wait before I judge people’s motives, and instinctively jumping to conclusions quickly. It’s the awkward place of feeling like you need to say something to someone, but you’re not yet sure whether they want you to say something.
In this transition, I sit as the listener in the room, the one willing to be the very last to speak, and the one unwilling to tease a new friend too hard. I pray for my children that their friends come quickly and that those friends are wise. I pray for my wife, that her friends come quickly and that those friends are encouraging. And, I pray for me, that my friends come in that perfect timing; and I pray that those friends be the ones that make being here worth truly being here. Know what I mean?
“One who is righteous is a guide to his neighbor.” -Proverbs 12:26a