Archive - Personal RSS Feed

I Hate Sam Luce

August 15, 2011 in Personal with 6 Comments

It’s been rumored in Australia for years, but today I’m coming out with the truth that all my twitter followers have been curious about for years.  I really hate Sam Luce.  I’ve known Sam for over the past 4 years, and my hate for him has grown exponentially every day since our first meeting.  Really, it’s true!

He's really a Nice Guy, Promise.

It wasn’t hard, since I hate 100 things about Sam Luce; but I’ve carefully narrowed it down to my top 10 reasons I hate Sam Luce.  (Nowhere on this list will you find complaints about the removal of skulls from his website, or his continued insistence that 50 degrees isn’t cold.)

  1. He likes the Yankees.  Seriously?  Liking the Yankees is like rooting for bank robbers and high-fiving kid trippers.
  2. He always answers his phone.  Who does this?  Every time I call Sam he answers his phone.  He’s always available and never puts me off for another time.  So annoying.
  3. He is skinny.  I know what you’re thinking, “Aren’t you skinny?”  Yes I am, but I still hate Sam Luce for stealing all my skinny jokes.
  4. He’s worked at the same church for over a decade.  Again who does this?  Doesn’t he know that he’s supposed to church hop every few years?  Did he miss that class in bible school?  Somehow he’s stayed committed to one church, one body, one congregation, and the same families for years and years.
  5. He has never fully appreciated sweet tea or Chik-fil-a.  He’s from the north, and thinks the perfect Christian chicken sandwich is overrated.  This is so lame, he needs more sweet tea.
  6. He way too friendly.  Have you ever met him at a conference?  He’s always smiling and shaking hands and talking to people.  So annoying when all you want to do is go get dinner, but Sam is running for mayor by shaking hands and kissing babies.
  7.  He calls me just to talk.  This makes him the weirdest of the weird, he just calls to say hello.  Why can’t I ever think to do this?  Because he’s Mr. perfect, and I’m not.  I hate this.
  8.  He displays his hate for fanny packs, but we all know he really collects and stores them in his basement.  I’m going to his house next weekend, and I’m going to search and report on my findings.  This hypocrisy has to be revealed for the sin he is living in!  (Not the sin of fanny packs, the sin of covering up his love for them.)
  9.  He’s always wanting to pray with me.  Sometimes I want to just complain and gripe; but Sam is always wanting to pray with me about it.  Arghh!
  10. He doesn’t understand the difference between sharing fajitas and ordering fajitas for two!  He thinks that if you share “fajitas for two” that you have to share your fork as well.
I could go on and on, but it’s best put by saying that Sam is totally crazy and different than anyone else I’ve ever met.  On a serious note, he’s easily one of my best friends and one of the smartest, nicest, and hardest to hate people in the entire world.  You’re a good friend Sam Luce, and I’d share my fajitas with you any day.  And I’d even let you have your own fork.

Family Fun with Spotify

August 5, 2011 in Personal with 4 Comments

Last week the family and I took a Texas vacation (aren’t those the best) in which we visited Dallas for a couple of nights, spent a week on Surfside Beach, and then trolled through Austin for a night before returning home.  All the travel made for 20+ hours of being in the car.  Have I mentioned we have 3 kids?  To top it all off the DVD player we’ve used for 9 years in the car finally breathed it’s last breathe last month.  How did we survive?  Besides the sharing of two Nintendo DS’s, we used Spotify.

I’m going to hope that you’ve spent time reading online about the greatness of Spotify.  It’s basically a music service that puts the value on accessibility of music over the ownership of music.  Simply put, you listen to whatever you want whenever you want.  For $9.99/a month you get the music on your iPhone.  After purchasing a iPod compatible stereo in the car this year, we had a Spotify car-trip for vacation.  Besides introducing my kids to tons of music they’ve never heard, we made up a few games too.

  • We started a Summer 2011 playlist.  (You can go listen to it HERE.)  Throughout all our travels the kids and parents, could choose to add a song we liked to the “Official Summer Playlist.”  If you got look at the playlist, you’ll see the absurdity of the collection.  It’s truly a Cliff family invention.
  • We played a bunch of “name that movie” games with movie songs.  The kids thought this was a blast, and were pretty good at naming the movies the music came from.  Probably the most fun thing we did in the car with Spotify.
  • Starr and I played a game where one of us chooses a song, then the next song has to be related in some way to the song just played.  It could be a shared word in the title, or same state mentioned in the lyrics, or anything else debatable that connects the two songs.

If you aren’t yet a user of Spotify, then go check it out today.  And make the investment  to hear the music in your car!  It’s changing family road trips for the better!

Vacation Relaxation

July 22, 2011 in Personal with 6 Comments

This weekend the family and I head out to Surfside Beach, TX for what is becoming an annual family vacation.  It’s a great time of sitting on the beach, playing games, watching movies, and eating food together as a family.  We’ve all been counting down the days to our “beach vacation” and now it sits squarely within view.

As I look forward to separating from what has become a stressful time in my life, I’m trying to figure out what it looks like to unplug; yet still enjoy my time away.  Here is a list of things I’ve decided to do (and hope my wife follows alongside with):

  • Throw out the calendar.  I promise to not once look at iCal, or my iPhone calendar.  I’m a calendar snob, but part of getting away though will require me to distance from this normal part of my life.
  • Only enjoy the Internet, not work it.  That means I’ll read news, follow some box scores, and see what’s up in the world at large.  However, there will be no emailing, facebooking, or blogging.  (I’ve even warned my staff that I’ll only return a call after the third voicemail left for me!)
  • Social Networking stops.  I often feel like I’m missing the meaning of being with my family when I take myself away from them to put a picture of my time with them on the Internet for a majority of strangers to see.  For this week it stops.
  •  Stay up late.  This isn’t much different from the normal life, but this time I can give myself time to recover with an afternoon nap or by sleeping in later!
  • I will not do things that take me away from my family, for the benefit of being with other people.  That includes texting friends, checking twitter (mentioned above), talking on the phone, words with friends, and anything else that diverts my attention from being with my family.  I expect this to be hard, but I’m working to eliminate the distractions.
  • Nothing deep.  I’m there to have fun with my family.  I’m not there to have long prolonged discussions about our future, our present, and what God may or may not be leading me to do.  It’s not the time.  It’s relax and fun time.
  • Lighten up.  When it comes to the kids, I promise to try my very hardest to lighten up on how I parent.  Respect and obedience will be required, but I’m going to work to not sweat the small stuff.
  •  Read for fun.  For this trip, I put all non-fiction reading on the shelf.  With the only exception being the Bible, I will be working through The Help, and the Game of Thrones.  Thank you Amazon Kindle for making reading so much fun!

Do Hard Things Sermon Video

July 5, 2011 in Personal with 0 Comments

This past weekend my Senior Pastor extended the opportunity to speak in all the weekend services at Trinity Church.  The message is one I’m passionate about, and something I felt pretty adamant about speaking to my local congregation to.  Thanks to Pastor Carl Toti for the opportunity, and his trust in me as one of his staff pastors.

Jonathan Cliff // Do Hard Things from TrinityChurchLBK on Vimeo.

13 Years on the 13th

June 13, 2011 in Personal with 2 Comments

Today we celebrate 13 years together. There is so much that I’ve learned in the past 13 years as it relates to living with and loving this woman that is my wife. Here are 13 Things I’ve learned over the past 13 years with my wife.

  1. Wouldn’t want to share a bathroom with anyone else. Even if I only get 10% of the counter space for myself.
  2. Laundry will just not ever be caught up with. Ain’t gonna happen, but I don’t mind at all.
  3. Being right is overrated. Being civil isn’t.
  4. It’s always more fun with her there, and always more lonely when she’s gone.
  5. A surprise Diet Coke in a big cup will always make her day better.
  6. Sitting quietly through girl movies is always better than making fun of them loudly.
  7. A small gesture means a lot with 3 (and sometimes 4) kids in the house.
  8. Funny things are more funny when she’s laughing with me.
  9. She will always laugh first when I’ve hurt myself in an accident. I’m learning to accept this unique way of dealing with bodily harm.
  10. Asking forgiveness is the greatest marital tool in the marriage toolbox.
  11. Holding hands is always worth the inconvenience of a sweaty palm.
  12. Having her to talk with me through life’s changes and ups and downs; is one of my favorite things about her.
  13. The ability to count years and years that we’ve been together is something I’ll always treasure!
Page 9 of 86« First...«7891011»203040...Last »