Do you know what Athazagoraphobia means? (If you do then please read another blog, because you’re way to smart to be reading this!)

Athazagoraphobia is the fear of forgetting. Now I don’t claim to have a real-life clinical phobia; but I do deal with this fear every day. Have you ever thought about all the things you’ve forgotten? You remember details about the biggest days of your life, good or bad, but the more years between your present and that big day the more you forget. I have moments when I actually think to myself, “Don’t Forget this, you’ll always want to remember!”

Some examples of things I so desperately DO NOT want to forget…

• What it’s like to hold all three of my kids at the same time and watch cartoons. (I actually am quite scared I’ll forget this feeling, because I’m not that far away from this being a distant memory.)
• What it’s like to be thought of as the greatest fixer of all things. (I think my kids still think I can make it stop raining.)
• How my daughter waddles like a drunk from room to room learning to walk. (I already have forgotten what my boys looked like doing this.)
• How my oldest son reminds me every day to pray with him before he goes to sleep. (Somehow I forget almost every night, and he draws me back.)
• What it’s like to be able to hold all three of my kids down at the same time and tickle them. (Have you ever heard three kids laugh violently?)
• What it’s like for my kids to actually enjoy being around me. (I know the teenage years will bring normal angst, so I don’t want to ever forget how many times I’m asked to wrestle or build towers with blocks.)

I could go on for hours with these things, and these memories only relate to my children. I fear that as I get older I’ll forget about that first date with my wife, forget the minor details of my wedding day, but most of all I’m afraid of forgetting all the in-between things. I know it sounds kinda silly to see all of it typed, but I seriously make the special efforts to remember all that I can. I will do everything I can to remember where I am in the present, and to remember most of what I can from the past; hopefully these memories can fuel my future memories and my ability to remember them.

The desire to forget the past is a form of suicide. -Richard Bode