Tag Archive - church

Staff Talk: Move Where You Want to Be

September 12, 2011 in Ministry with 1 Comment

Navigating the dangerous, yet rewarding waters of Church Staff Relationships takes a certain kind of courage.  It first takes the courage to figure out what it is that you want.  Then it takes even more courage to take the next step of actually moving in the direction you want to go.  Again, it sounds silly doesn’t it?

What is it going to take for things to flourish in your staff relationships?  What are you going to have to DO to make things get healthy and stay healthy?

Those I Lead -> This should be the easy one, right?  As the leader it falls on us to ACT on those things we have defined.  You’re the leader, implement with honor and integrity what you want to see in your area of responsibility.  One way to do this is to encourage feedback in individual settings, as it pertains to the team as a whole. As the leader you are the standard bearer, act like it!

Those I Cooperate With -> It’s upon you as a coworker to CHANGE what you can about your relationships to bring about what you defined.  Change yourself first, then act patiently to change others. (Knowing they might now!)  I’m sure you’ve heard the famous Ghandi quote, “Be the change you want to see in the world.”  It’s especially true in the peer staff relationships at our churches!

Those I Follow -> In this hard place of moving in the direction you want to move with your own leader, it falls on you to INFLUENCE your leader in creative ways to help bring about the defined goals.  Do not, I repeat, do not walk into your bosses office and tell them exactly what you are doing to improve your relationship.  That would be a relationship-killer!  Instead pray and act honestly and openly with your senior leadership.  It’s imperative that you prove you can be trusted, before being completely honest and open about your goals.

So you’ve defined the goals, and now you are acting to make it happen.  Let’s all agree that it’s hard to move when you’ve grown comfortable (even when unhappy), but let’s also agree that moving is what has to happen for things to change.  I believe in you!

What are you willing to change to make it happen?  Dare you to leave a comment and tell me!

Staff Talk: What Do You Want?

September 7, 2011 in Ministry with 4 Comments

Learning to navigate staff relationships so that you are healthy and happy can be a difficult road.  However, it is a road that is possible to navigate.  It all starts with defining the culture and atmosphere you want to work in.  That sounds too simple, doesn’t it?  It sounds simple, because it is simple.  Before you can ‘work on it’ you need to know WHAT you want.  Don’t be afraid to be specific.

For example, you might say that you want your work environment to be one that is fun, or respectful, or harboring trust, or where accountability is practiced.  Whatever you want, you need to sit down with a pen and paper and figure out what it is that you want.

I think of it like this: If someone were to walk into your working environment and observe your team; what would they tell you it looks like?  It may seem silly to say this, but the time taken to define what you want is often put off.  But it’s worth your time to figure this part out.

But what does it look like within the context of the three working relationships we have at work?

Those I Lead -> What would you want people to say about the department you lead, or the department you manage?  One key thing to remember for those I lead: involve them in helping to define what this should be.  I’m not saying that you let them define it, but you let them have a voice in the conversation.

Those I Cooperate With -> If someone evaluated the relationship between you and a staff peer, what would you want them to discover?  As I cannot make those I work with do what I want, this becomes inwardly focused.  I have to ask myself these questions: What could I learn from those I work with?  What could I offer to those I work with?  What could happen if I got along with those I work with?  Invest the time necessary to see what you want from those you work with.

Those I Follow -> How would you define a healthy relationship with your senior leader?  Much like those I cooperate with, this one is inwardly focused.  I’ve talked to so many people at churches that are unhappy with their relationship with their Senior leader; but few of them can tell me exactly what they even want out of their senior leader.  What is it that you want.

We could sum up this opening principle by saying that before you get to the DOING part of navigating staff relationships, you DEFINE what you want.

So here’s the question to you: What do you want from those you work with?  Comment NOW!!

Navigating Staff Relationships

September 6, 2011 in Ministry with 16 Comments

I remember my very first day at Trinity Church in Lubbock.  I was taken across campus to fill out some HR and tax paperwork, and after I finished I found myself all alone in someone’s office that was far from my own.  I asked where I needed to go next, and was told that I should go to my office and start the adventure.  However, there was one problem.  I didn’t know where my office was!  I spent the next 30 minutes walking around campus looking for my office.  In fact, it wasn’t until a week later that I discovered that the lady working outside my office door actually worked for me.  Amazing, I had an assistant and it took me a week to figure it out!

Now things have gotten much better at Trinity for new employees, but it’s still proof that being on a church staff can be quite the adventure.  Guess what I hear when I talk to people in church ministry?  Few want to talk about their ministry, but a good deal of people want to lament their pastors, peers, or volunteers.

Why is this so?

Because the most challenging and most unprepared aspect of working in church ministry is how we work within our staff structures.  Let’s be honest, how many of us ever dreamed that working with others would be so hard…at a church?!?

This week I want to talk about something that has consumed my life as of late.  Learning to navigate all the different staff relationships we deal with inside of a church-staff setting.  Before we get started, let’s look at defining the three main categories of all staff relationships.

Define the Three Main Categories of Staff Relationships:

  1. Those we Lead
    1. Subordinates = Staff that reports to us directly.
    2. Volunteers = Those that serve in our areas and depend on us for leadership.
  2. Those we Cooperate with in accomplishing the Greater Vision of our churches
    1. Co-Workers = Peers that work on our same level within the organization
    2. If you’re the Kid’s Pastor, here is your Youth Pastor
  1. Those we Follow
    1. Managers = Direct Reports
    2. Executive Leaders/Pastors = Lead those we report to, or lead us directly.
    3. Senior Pastors = Leader of entire organization
Somewhere in the realm of all three of these we operate.  People we lead, people we cooperate with (or should be cooperating with), and people we follow and serve under.  As we start to identify the 4 principles of navigating through the sometimes treachrous, but always rewarding church staff relationships, I’d like to hear from you.
How many do you lead?  
How many are considered your ‘peers’ on your church staff?  
Who leads you, is it an executive pastor, department pastor, or do you sit directly under a Senior Pastor?  

I Hate Sam Luce

August 15, 2011 in Personal with 6 Comments

It’s been rumored in Australia for years, but today I’m coming out with the truth that all my twitter followers have been curious about for years.  I really hate Sam Luce.  I’ve known Sam for over the past 4 years, and my hate for him has grown exponentially every day since our first meeting.  Really, it’s true!

He's really a Nice Guy, Promise.

It wasn’t hard, since I hate 100 things about Sam Luce; but I’ve carefully narrowed it down to my top 10 reasons I hate Sam Luce.  (Nowhere on this list will you find complaints about the removal of skulls from his website, or his continued insistence that 50 degrees isn’t cold.)

  1. He likes the Yankees.  Seriously?  Liking the Yankees is like rooting for bank robbers and high-fiving kid trippers.
  2. He always answers his phone.  Who does this?  Every time I call Sam he answers his phone.  He’s always available and never puts me off for another time.  So annoying.
  3. He is skinny.  I know what you’re thinking, “Aren’t you skinny?”  Yes I am, but I still hate Sam Luce for stealing all my skinny jokes.
  4. He’s worked at the same church for over a decade.  Again who does this?  Doesn’t he know that he’s supposed to church hop every few years?  Did he miss that class in bible school?  Somehow he’s stayed committed to one church, one body, one congregation, and the same families for years and years.
  5. He has never fully appreciated sweet tea or Chik-fil-a.  He’s from the north, and thinks the perfect Christian chicken sandwich is overrated.  This is so lame, he needs more sweet tea.
  6. He way too friendly.  Have you ever met him at a conference?  He’s always smiling and shaking hands and talking to people.  So annoying when all you want to do is go get dinner, but Sam is running for mayor by shaking hands and kissing babies.
  7.  He calls me just to talk.  This makes him the weirdest of the weird, he just calls to say hello.  Why can’t I ever think to do this?  Because he’s Mr. perfect, and I’m not.  I hate this.
  8.  He displays his hate for fanny packs, but we all know he really collects and stores them in his basement.  I’m going to his house next weekend, and I’m going to search and report on my findings.  This hypocrisy has to be revealed for the sin he is living in!  (Not the sin of fanny packs, the sin of covering up his love for them.)
  9.  He’s always wanting to pray with me.  Sometimes I want to just complain and gripe; but Sam is always wanting to pray with me about it.  Arghh!
  10. He doesn’t understand the difference between sharing fajitas and ordering fajitas for two!  He thinks that if you share “fajitas for two” that you have to share your fork as well.
I could go on and on, but it’s best put by saying that Sam is totally crazy and different than anyone else I’ve ever met.  On a serious note, he’s easily one of my best friends and one of the smartest, nicest, and hardest to hate people in the entire world.  You’re a good friend Sam Luce, and I’d share my fajitas with you any day.  And I’d even let you have your own fork.

Separation Fixing

August 3, 2011 in Ministry with 10 Comments

Separation is defined as an intervening space.  It’s the space between two objects.  It’s also the space between different ministries in our churches.

After serving in a church for some time now, I see another separation that happens and I’d love your help to solve it.  Maybe my words won’t express it correctly, but there seems to be a separation between what Senior Leadership at our churches see and what those working with families, students, and children see.  This isn’t an attack on either side, but here’s what I see:

Senior Leadership sees:

  • Events, events, events
  • Cost-Cutting budgets
  • Necessary Childcare

Family Ministry Leadership sees:

  • Weekend Experiences
  • Children being discipled
  • Volunteers serving
So who’s wrong?  Nobody is wrong.  I’m old enough now to know that different positions within the church bring different perspectives.  It’s important that as a Children’s Minister, that I also understand the idea that the senior leadership has an entire church to fund ministry for.  It’s important that as a senior leader, that I understand the heart of ministry that lives within those ministering to children.
So I’ve spoken towards the divide that exists, and now I have a question for you.  Don’t leave this blog without offering some answers for all of us.
How do we bridge the gap between these two very important positions in the church?
Have at it in the comments will you!
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