I returned last week from an awesome week at Dry Gulch U.S.A. with about 50 kids from our church. The camp is stellar, albeit super-expensive; which is the main reason that we will be researching some new desitnations in 2011. The week really was fantastic, from the camp activities like horseback riding, swimming, and tubing on the lake The services were fantastic, and the kids (and adults) that attended had a blast.
Here is a list of the not so important things I learned at summer camp:
The restrooms adjacent to the pool areas is always the least used bathroom at camp.
Girls will always give you a hug upon your arrival, while boys prefer a fist bump.
I have a theory that 90% of hired bus drivers are devoid of all personality. My bus driver was from that 90% pool.
When telling a boy to take a shower, be sure to emphasize the need for them to use soap.
When 20+ girls are together in any one space, there will always be a ton of hair braiding happening.
When 20+ boys are together in any one space, there will always be a ton of farting happening.
The kid that cries when leaving his mother for a week, is almost always the same kid that cries when leaving camp after that same week.
Girls are more photogenic than boys. Every year the parents of my boys complain that we didn’t get enough pictures of the boys, but the boys hide from the camera and only pick their noses on camera. However, the girls see a camera and immediately form into picture taking groups. It’s amazing!
I really love having fun with kids.
I really love seeing kids “get it” in chapel services.
I had the opportunity, privilege, and pleasure to baptize my oldest son this weekend. I’ve been asked many times, “As a Children’s Pastor, I bet you’re really excited to do this, huh?” My answer is usually nice and cordial, but to be honest my excitement over my son’s eternal salvation has nothing to do with being a Children’s Pastor and everything to do with being his father.
From the time my son was in vitro, from those early morning hours of feedings, to the first steps, to the first bites of carrots, first soccer games, first words, first days of school and so forth and so forth; my prayer for him has been the very same. I have prayed the words of a song that was popular around his birth. They are the words to that song “One Pure and Holy Passion.”
Give me one pure and holy passion Give me one magnificent obsession Give me one glorious ambition for my life To know and follow hard after You
It has been my prayer that when Ryan seeks after God he would find Him there waiting. It has been my prayer that when confronted with his own inadequacies and faults, it would be the reaction of his heart to reach towards Christ. It has been my prayer that when he admits his sin, believes in Christ, and confesses it with his mouth; that his next move would be to follow hard after Christ.
I often tell parents that most kids aren’t really in a good place to understand this until they are around 8 or 9 or even 10 or 11. There is no hard, firm age for these things; but there are some things we can look for in our children to know if they are ready. I encourage parents to not rush their children into a decision, and instead work to demonstrate living, active faith before their children. I also encourage them to quickly reward the curiosity of their children with answers to life’s questions and questions about God, faith, and morality.
But my son has proven to be an exception. Ryan is the most thoughtful, deep, profound, inquisitive, and reflective 7 year old I’ve ever been around. I know, I know… it’s my son and I’m biased. But I’m telling you, there are not 7 year olds like my son. He’s just in a different place emotionally than most 7 year olds. He’s different.
When he began to ask questions about faith, it wasn’t from a “What do I have to do to be like others?” or “I want to be baptized, what now?” perspective. It was more from a “Why would someone pray to Jesus?” and “I’m thinking this sin in my life might be a problem, Dad.” His mother and I diligently answered his questions, but never put the question back on him. We would answer and leave it til another day. Eventually the questions became more and more frequent. One night after an exhaustive journey through Romans, he was really struggling with a decision. I told him to just think about what he knew, and I would be here if he needed any help.
After a half hour of thinking about it, he approached me and his mother to ask, “I need to tell God my mistakes, and tell him I believe. I believe all these things about Jesus and I need to tell him.” I told him to go ahead and pray, and without putting words in his mouth he prayed for God to forgive him of his sins, and told Jesus that he believed in Him. He did it all on his own. He was taking the first steps towards following hard after Christ, and I couldn’t be more proud of him.
My prayer is that as my kids grow, these people will be around to give them the same messages I’m giving, but in a different voice and from a different perspective.
Thank you Lord that in the short time we’ve lived in Lubbock, you’ve made us a part of a spiritual family. Thank you for these people who love and influence our kids toward loving You. Bless them Lord, and keep providing opportunities for authentic relationship.
I often get asked about where parents can find resources to assist them in the journey of raising their kids. This is going to sound strange, but I think a dog behavior show might be the most valuable resource available. Seriously.
My family and I love to watch The Dog Whisperer. Have you seen this show? It’s a show on National Geographic TV, and it features Cesar Millan showing up to help solve dog problems. It’s quite a sight to see these disruptive dogs become well-behaved members of the home. He uses a few different techniques, much of which includes simply taking charge of the dog. Go figure, huh? He says he “rehabilitates dogs and trains humans.” I think what he does is super applicable to parents.
He is constantly warning dog owners to not let emotions dictate how you treat your dog. He always references humans feeling sorry for the dog, and he says that prevents us from dealing with the dog in a dog-appropriate way. Parents, can you see this coming? As parents we can easily be swayed to give our children things based out of our guilt, fear, or both at the same time. While emotions are a valuable part of any relationship, when raising children we need to stay in the clear. For instance, let’s say your kid steals something from a friend at school. He’s caught red-handed, and confesses right away. Do you back off on any consequences because he’s so upset about his own bad choice, or do you make him face that consequence? I’ve seen parents be so swayed by the emotions of a situation, that they fail to provide a strong covering of discipline for their kids.
The Dog Whisperer also points out that dogs live “in the moment.” They respond to strong leadership and require “rules, boundaries and limitations” to feel secure and part of the “pack.” I feel that I could exchange the word dogs, with children. Am I alone? As a person that works with other peoples kids, let me tell you that this is lacking! I often hear parents say, “My kids are so much better behaved for you than they are for me.” I’m not casting magical obedience spells on their children, I just treat them like a dog. That sounds bad, doesn’t it? I meant to say that I provide strong leadership and require rules, boundaries and limitations. Does that sound better?
Cesar always begins the show with an observation of the relationship between the dog and their humans. He often finds that the humans are the ones that must learn a different way to handle their pets. I have three kids, and each kid forces me to parent them in a different way. While there are certain standards that are the same for every one of them, I also can’t expect the same reaction out of each of them. For example, my daughter requires more rules than my boys. For some reason she seems to want to push the envelope on things and the boys just take it as it comes. Different methods for the same overall goal.
While these lessons learned on The Dog Whisperer are great for parents, but I also want to add that the snapping, shushing, and finger pointing can come in handy with kids as well. I’m just sayin’.
This kid of mine is 7 years old today. You’ll have to forgive the predictable banter about how I can’t believe my baby has grown up this fast. Seriously, he’s 7? This kid that made me a father for the very first time is FREAKING 7 years old? Unbelievable.
Now that we got that out of the way… Let me tell you about this unbelievable 7 year old. Ryan is the kid that makes people that hate other kids start liking kids. Did you catch that? He’s a kid that will convince childless couples that they should hurry home and start making kids. Of course I should warn them, that Ryan is a rare breed. Not the typical 7 year old boy.
What makes him different?
I’m so glad you asked, for starters he’s sensitive to others. There are the occasional exceptions in regards to his little brother, but mostly he’s a great listener and really has a passion for connecting with other kids and adults. Secondly, he’s smart in ways that aren’t normal for 7 year olds. He’s that kid that just started reading one day and is now a fluent reader of all things, and is taken with the great gift of actually WANTING to learn. Then you can throw in the fact this this kid is just so darn handsome (not taking credit, not taking credit, not taking credit.) He is also the most creative person in our house. Whether it be with trash, paper, colored pencils, crayons, markers, or dirt; he makes a work of art every time. That’s why I love the picture from above. For his birthday he got some 3-D sidewalk chalk, and has proceeded to turn our driveway into his own personal masterpiece. It even rained the first night, and no worries. He was out there first thing in the morning to replace it all with a few little changes here and there. Finally he’s a good friend to those that know him. His naive little spirit cannot wrap his brain around why someone would ever be mean to another person. He has such a sweet, sweet spirit towards his friends.
Ryan has been an exceptional 1st grader this year, and is one of the last in his class to turn 7. It’s a big day for this 7 year old. It’s a big day for us, too.
This is a sped-up video of our 15 minute drive to the Library and back on the day of the week commonly referred to as “Daddy Day.” It’s my day off work, so I usually run around town in the mornings with my two Stay-at-homers. You may see their mouths moving, it’s because we were singing “Happy Day” over and over and over and over and over and over…
See if you can count how many boogers my daughter picks and subsequently wipes under her chair…
This is NOT filmed using my FlipHD camera, because I left it at the office. :(
