I had the opportunity, privilege, and pleasure to baptize my oldest son this weekend.  I’ve been asked many times, “As a Children’s Pastor, I bet you’re really excited to do this, huh?”  My answer is usually nice and cordial, but to be honest my excitement over my son’s eternal salvation has nothing to do with being a Children’s Pastor and everything to do with being his father.

From the time my son was in vitro, from those early morning hours of feedings, to the first steps, to the first bites of carrots, first soccer games, first words, first days of school and so forth and so forth; my prayer for him has been the very same.  I have prayed the words of a song that was popular around his birth.  They are the words to that song “One Pure and Holy Passion.”

Give me one pure and holy passion
Give me one magnificent obsession
Give me one glorious ambition for my life
To know and follow hard after You

It has been my prayer that when Ryan seeks after God he would find Him there waiting.  It has been my prayer that when confronted with his own inadequacies and faults, it would be the reaction of his heart to reach towards Christ.  It has been my prayer that when he admits his sin, believes in Christ, and confesses it with his mouth; that his next move would be to follow hard after Christ.

I often tell parents that most kids aren’t really in a good place to understand this until they are around 8 or 9 or even 10 or 11.  There is no hard, firm age for these things; but there are some things we can look for in our children to know if they are ready.  I encourage parents to not rush their children into a decision, and instead work to demonstrate living, active faith before their children.  I also encourage them to quickly reward the curiosity of their children with answers to life’s questions and questions about God, faith, and morality.

But my son has proven to be an exception.  Ryan is the most thoughtful, deep, profound, inquisitive, and reflective 7 year old I’ve ever been around.  I know, I know… it’s my son and I’m biased.  But I’m telling you, there are not 7 year olds like my son.  He’s just in a different place emotionally than most 7 year olds.  He’s different.

When he began to ask questions about faith, it wasn’t from a “What do I have to do to be like others?” or “I want to be baptized, what now?” perspective.  It was more from a “Why would someone pray to Jesus?” and “I’m thinking this sin in my life might be a problem, Dad.”  His mother and I diligently answered his questions, but never put the question back on him.  We would answer and leave it til another day.  Eventually the questions became more and more frequent.  One night after an exhaustive journey through Romans, he was really struggling with a decision.  I told him to just think about what he knew, and I would be here if he needed any help.

After a half hour of thinking about it, he approached me and his mother to ask, “I need to tell God my mistakes, and tell him I believe.  I believe all these things about Jesus and I need to tell him.”  I told him to go ahead and pray, and without putting words in his mouth he prayed for God to forgive him of his sins, and told Jesus that he believed in Him.  He did it all on his own.  He was taking the first steps towards following hard after Christ, and I couldn’t be more proud of him.

You can see more of what we did after Ryan’s Baptism to celebrate his decision, and the impact of so many other people in his life on my wife’s blog at http://www.lostinlaundry.com/2009/10/were-widening-circle.html.

She summed it up perfectly:

My prayer is that as my kids grow, these people will be around to give them the same messages I’m giving, but in a different voice and from a different perspective.

Thank you Lord that in the short time we’ve lived in Lubbock, you’ve made us a part of a spiritual family. Thank you for these people who love and influence our kids toward loving You. Bless them Lord, and keep providing opportunities for authentic relationship.

I often get asked about where parents can find resources to assist them in the journey of raising their kids.  This is going to sound strange, but I think a dog behavior show might be the most valuable resource available.  Seriously.

My family and I love to watch The Dog Whisperer.  Have you seen this show?  It’s a show on National Geographic TV, and it features Cesar Millan showing up to help solve dog problems.  It’s quite a sight to see these disruptive dogs become well-behaved members of the home.  He uses a few different techniques, much of which includes simply taking charge of the dog.  Go figure, huh?  He says he “rehabilitates dogs and trains humans.” I think what he does is super applicable to parents.

He is constantly warning dog owners to not let emotions dictate how you treat your dog.  He always references humans feeling sorry for the dog, and he says that prevents us from dealing with the dog in a dog-appropriate way.  Parents, can you see this coming?  As parents we can easily be swayed to give our children things based out of our guilt, fear, or both at the same time.  While emotions are a valuable part of any relationship, when raising children we need to stay in the clear.  For instance, let’s say your kid steals something from a friend at school.  He’s caught red-handed, and confesses right away.  Do you back off on any consequences because he’s so upset about his own bad choice, or do you make him face that consequence?  I’ve seen parents be so swayed by the emotions of a situation, that they fail to provide a strong covering of discipline for their kids.

The Dog Whisperer also points out that dogs live “in the moment.” They respond to strong leadership and require “rules, boundaries and limitations” to feel secure and part of the “pack.”  I feel that I could exchange the word dogs, with children.  Am I alone? As a person that works with other peoples kids, let me tell you that this is lacking!  I often hear parents say, “My kids are so much better behaved for you than they are for me.”  I’m not casting magical obedience spells on their children, I just treat them like a dog.  That sounds bad, doesn’t it?  I meant to say that I provide strong leadership and require rules, boundaries and limitations.  Does that sound better?

Cesar always begins the show with an observation of the relationship between the dog and their humans. He often finds that the humans are the ones that must learn a different way to handle their pets.  I have three kids, and each kid forces me to parent them in a different way.  While there are certain standards that are the same for every one of them, I also can’t expect the same reaction out of each of them.  For example, my daughter requires more rules than my boys.  For some reason she seems to want to push the envelope on things and the boys just take it as it comes. Different methods for the same overall goal.

While these lessons learned on The Dog Whisperer are great for parents, but I also want to add that the snapping, shushing, and finger pointing can come in handy with kids as well.  I’m just sayin’.

This kid of mine is 7 years old today.  You’ll have to forgive the predictable banter about how I can’t believe my baby has grown up this fast.  Seriously, he’s 7?  This kid that made me a father for the very first time is FREAKING 7 years old?  Unbelievable.

Now that we got that out of the way…  Let me tell you about this unbelievable 7 year old.  Ryan is the kid that makes people that hate other kids start liking kids.  Did you catch that?  He’s a kid that will convince childless couples that they should hurry home and start making kids.  Of course I should warn them, that Ryan is a rare breed.  Not the typical 7 year old boy.

What makes him different?

I’m so glad you asked, for starters he’s sensitive to others.  There are the occasional exceptions in regards to his little brother, but mostly he’s a great listener and really has a passion for connecting with other kids and adults.  Secondly, he’s smart in ways that aren’t normal for 7 year olds.  He’s that kid that just started reading one day and is now a fluent reader of all things, and is taken with the great gift of actually WANTING to learn.  Then you can throw in the fact this this kid is just so darn handsome (not taking credit, not taking credit, not taking credit.)  He is also the most creative person in our house.  Whether it be with trash, paper, colored pencils, crayons, markers, or dirt; he makes a work of art every time.  That’s why I love the picture from above.  For his birthday he got some 3-D sidewalk chalk, and has proceeded to turn our driveway into his own personal masterpiece.  It even rained the first night, and no worries.  He was out there first thing in the morning to replace it all with a few little changes here and there.  Finally he’s a good friend to those that know him.  His naive little spirit cannot wrap his brain around why someone would ever be mean to another person.  He has such a sweet, sweet spirit towards his friends.

Ryan has been an exceptional 1st grader this year, and is one of the last in his class to turn 7.  It’s a big day for this 7 year old.  It’s a big day for us, too.

Happy Birthday Ryan!

Friday Car Drive from JC on Vimeo.

This is a sped-up video of our 15 minute drive to the Library and back on the day of the week commonly referred to as “Daddy Day.” It’s my day off work, so I usually run around town in the mornings with my two Stay-at-homers. You may see their mouths moving, it’s because we were singing “Happy Day” over and over and over and over and over and over…

See if you can count how many boogers my daughter picks and subsequently wipes under her chair…

This is NOT filmed using my FlipHD camera, because I left it at the office. :(

Go ahead and tell me that isn’t the cutest stinking picture you’ve ever seen of two brothers!  I’m blown away by how great this picture is.  With the exception of the aluminum bat, you could make this picture black and white and it would look just like brothers in the 50’s playing baseball.  Good Stuff!

This year we’ve had a an exciting spring with both the boys playing on the same baseball team.  We’ve only had victory once; but the chance to coach a team with both my boys on it has been a thrill.  Today I had an experience that made me want to encourage all parents to give their children the opportunity to play organized sports.

Ryan, my 6 year old, is one of the better players on the team.  It helps that he’s 6 months older than everyone else, but nonetheless he’s a pretty darn good baseball player.  Over the past few games he’s had a rough go of it, with a grand slam called back for throwing his bat (it really just rolled out of the batters circle) and some fielding miscues that have cost his team dearly.

In today’s game as he returned to the pitchers mound after again being called out for throwing his bat, he was pretty messed up inside and trying to fight back the tears.  I got down on a knee and told him to get a grip!  I know, I know…it sounds mean, but what I really told him was that now was not the time to think about his last mistake, and that instead he had to help his entire team by being ready to give his best in the field.  I helped him count to 5 to clear his head, and slapped him on the butt and told him to go out there and kick some butt.

As I returned to the dugout, I had this clear thought.  Where else would my kid learn such a valuable lesson?  I know that not all kids are athletically gifted, but at the youngest of ages I don’t think it matters.  The lessons of giving your all for a team, putting your mistakes behind you, and learning to get better are going to prove invaluable to both my boys…not to mention all the great snacks given away at the end of every game.